When she tells you that she is pregnant (and yes, it’s yours), there is a right way to respond…and definitely a wrong way to response.

K. Lee’s friend has been married for about a year, and his wife just told him that she’s pregnant. He called K. Lee and told him the news, and when K. Lee found out they weren’t actively trying and asked his friend what he said when he found out, his friend said… “Oh. F**k.”

Which prompted K. Lee to come up with a list of all the things you shouldn’t say when you find out your partner is pregnant.

1. Oh F**k.
2. So what you gonna do?
3. Is it mine?
4. Just because we’re having a kid doesn’t mean we have to be together.
5. *crickets*
6. I can tell, because that explains the weight.
7. How could this have happened?! Did you forget to take your pill???
8. Did you take a test? HOW many tests???? There’s a chance it’s inaccurate.
9. At least your boobs will get huge.
10. I don’t want to go to kids’ birthday parties.
11. There goes life.

And then there’s a HUGE TWIST TO THIS LIST.